Author: Louis Cicalese

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Three Ways to Calm Your Anxiety from Funerals

sad woman with anxiety

It is natural to feel overwhelmed when attending a funeral. Funerals are a very intense time, especially if the death was unexpected. Whether you attend a funeral or not is ultimately your decision, however, if you want to learn how to fight back from the anxiety you feel and show up, here are three ways to cope with the anxiety.

  1. Open Up to Someone

Bottling up your anxiety and fear does not make it go away, it just makes the feeling stronger. One way to calm your nerves is expressing yourself to a close friend or family member. Many funeral directors offer support and guidance to get people through a funeral, so it might be worth it to reach out to them.

  1. Remember That it’s Okay to Show Emotion

Many people are not comfortable showing intense emotions or grief, but just remember that it’s okay to do so. You don’t have to hide or suppress your feelings at a funeral. This is the time to express your grief and get support from those around you.

  1. Practice Self-Care

Anxiety is just one of the many emotional and physical results of grief. When grieving, you may experience the inability to sleep, eat, or you may feel physically sick. To prepare for a funeral, practice mindfulness or take a soothing bath to help calm yourself down.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

Source: Funeral Guide

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The Burial Process: What You Should Know

tombstones at Weehawken Cemetery

The passage of a loved one is a very emotional time and all the decision-making involved can leave you confused, frustrated, and looking for answers. When making decisions for your loved one, you may need more information on the choices you have to make. Here is some information that can help you when choosing what is best for you and your loved one.

What is a Burial Vault?

A burial vault is an optional part of the burial process. Burial vaults encase the casket, protecting it from heavy machinery used in cemeteries, and of course, the earth above it. The benefits of a burial vault are that it prevents the casket from buckling due to the weight of the ground and decay. Burial vaults prevent the ground from sinking above the casket, keeping the grounds pristine for visitation.

What is Cremation?

Cremation in an alternative type of body disposal to coffins or caskets. After the remains are incinerated in a cremation chamber, what is left are the basic chemical compounds which include gases, ashes, and mineral fragments, otherwise known as cremains. The cremains are usually kept in an urn or special container. Some may choose to bury the ashes, while others keep the urns in their homes.

What is a Green Burial?

Green burials are an eco-friendly alternative to traditional burials. There are no chemicals involved, such as embalming fluids, and the body is placed in a biodegradable coffin or shroud without a concrete burial vault. The benefits of this type of burial are that it is a simple burial process, it can be less expensive than traditional burials, it preserves natural resources, it removes harmful chemicals, and it saves natural areas.

If you want to learn more about the information above or if you have any additional questions, please contact Louis Cicalese, Cemetery President and Trustee today.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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How Different Cultures Honor the Deceased

casket with flowers on top

It is always interesting to learn about the differences between cultures and one of the most interesting differences among cultures is the way they honor the deceased. What may seem crazy to one culture is totally normal to another culture and vice versa. Here are three of the more interesting ways to honor the dead from various countries and cultures around the world.

China & The Philippines

In China and The Philippines, some people honor their loved ones who have passed by hanging their coffins on a mountainside. They believe that the closer the coffin is the to sky, the closer their loved ones are to heaven.

South Korea

South Korea has limited space for burials, so they had to get imaginative with the way they honored their loved ones. They have adopted the practice of cremating the bodies of the dead and pressing their ashes into jewelry-like beads. These beads are usually colorful and kept in a bottle or urn.

New Orleans, Louisiana

In New Orleans, they honor their loved ones by playing somber jazz music from the funeral home to the place of burial. After they have buried their loved one, they play more up-beat jazz music to celebrate the life of their loved one who has passed on.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

Source: Everplans

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What to Consider When Choosing a Cemetery

louis cicalese cemetery landscape

Choosing a cemetery can feel daunting and overwhelming, however, when you know what characteristics to consider, it can make the decision process a little easier. If you have already discussed burial wishes with your loved ones prior to passing, then the decision will be less difficult. If you have not, here’s a list of attributes to think about when making your final decision.

Location

You or your loved ones may have a specific or general location in mind to be buried. Many people want to be buried close to home, or maybe in a location that some of their family has been laid to rest in. If there are multiple cemetery options for your situation, you may want to consider taking a trip to each one to view the grounds. You should think about which one feels right and which one you would feel good about visiting your loved ones in.

Type of Cemetery

There are four main types of cemeteries: public, religious, district or municipal, and national or veterans’ cemeteries. Each type of cemetery meets different specific needs.

  1. Public Cemeteries

Public cemeteries are the most common type of cemetery. They are usually for-profit and run corporately or independently. These can be found through word of mouth, local funeral homes, or through online search.

  1. Religious Cemeteries

These cemeteries are usually non-profit and run by religious organizations. If you are interested in a religious cemetery, contact your local church, synagogue, or mosque to find a location that’s right for you.

  1. District or Municipal Cemeteries

These are non-profit cemeteries owned by the city or county. You can find these types of cemeteries by contacting your town clerk or city hall.

  1. National or Veterans’ Cemeteries

These types of cemeteries are government-run and created for veterans and their families. If you are interested in a location like this, your local funeral home may be able to help you make those arrangements.

Costs

It is important to consider all present and future costs of a cemetery location before choosing one. Make sure you ask for a price list that includes all present and future costs.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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What is a Green Burial?

louis cicalese cemetery land

With the current state that our planet is in, it is important to think about sustainability and our environmental impact in everything we do in life. However, it is also important to think about our environmental impact on our planet even after we pass away. With environmental consciousness becoming more and more common, people are starting to consider alternate burial options, such as green burials, instead of traditional types of burials.

Green Burial Details

With a green burial, the body does not require any chemicals, such as embalming fluids, and it is placed in a biodegradable coffin or shroud without a concrete burial vault. Burying the body in this way allows for complete decomposition and the natural return to soil.

The Benefits of a Green Burial

  1. Simplicity

Green burials that use a biodegradable coffin or shroud are very simple compared to traditional burials that require a large, heavy coffin. Those who like to keep things simple would prefer a green burial over a more traditional coffin.

  1. Less Expensive

The costs of embalming, caskets, and concrete vaults are not required for a green burial meaning that those costs are eliminated. Without these costs, families can save thousands of dollars.

  1. Preserving Natural Resources

Green burials use fewer natural resources than a traditional burial. Traditional burials require a large amount of hardwood, steel, copper, and concrete which very little, if any, is required for a green burial.

  1. Removes Harmful Chemicals

Embalming fluids contain formaldehyde which is a respiratory irritant and carcinogen. With green burials, this harmful chemical is eliminated from the burial process.

  1. Saving Natural Areas

Green cemeteries can help save natural habitats and do not require the elimination of trees.

All our cemetery locations provide the option of green burials. If you are interested in learning more about the burial services offered at Louis Cicalese cemeteries, you can contact us to learn more.

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The History of Cremations

Louis Cicalese Cemeteries

The Beginning

Historians estimate that cremations have been around since the Stone Age around 3000 B.C. and was presented to Westerners by the Greeks. In ancient history, cremation was seen as an honorable way to go after battle, but it went through ups and downs in popularity. For example, cremation became frowned upon by the Catholic church due to the concept of resurrection after death but was again accepted after Pope Paul VI lifted the ban in 1963.

Cremations Now

Cremation remains a popular choice upon death for a variety of reasons. Cremation offers more flexibility in space, price, and even mobility. Being cremated into ashes gives families an opportunity to easily personalize their loved ones final resting place by holding the ashes in multiple places or customizing an urn. Many individuals have wishes to be spread across mountains, be planted as trees, or even made into a diamond, which to some sounds more appealing than being buried. However, burial options are still available for those cremated individuals who wish to be buried with other loved ones.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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Reasons to Visit a Cemetery

louis cicalese cemetery

Although visiting a cemetery when you’re not required to may seem like a grave idea, there is more to gain for those who decide to visit on their own time.

Learning About History

At burial grounds, there are plenty of passed individuals with complex stories just like ours. Taking note of the names you pass and researching history about them at your local library can be one of the best ways to learn about previous generations and connect to the town you currently live in or are visiting.

Quiet Reflection

Many of those who visit cemeteries say they find their time there very peaceful. With plenty of greenery and statues, cemeteries are ideal for quiet reflection. For many, it is a humbling experience that gives them opportunity to realize that time on Earth isn’t forever and helps them prioritize what really matters.

Pay Your Respects

At the heart, cemeteries are places to honor those that have passed. Visiting relatives can help you feel closer to them and is often an important part of the grieving process. Whether or not you have or had loved ones in the service, consider observing military graves. Observing those who laid their life down for their country is one way to show appreciation and gratitude.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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The Cost Benefits of Mausoleums vs. In-Ground Burials

Louis Cicalese Cemetery

Finding the proper ceremony and type of burial can feel overwhelming, especially when you are feeling the grief of losing a loved one. There are many things to consider when deciding what is best for your loved one and each person comes with a unique set of needs. Mausoleums and in-ground burials are two options for your family, and they both come with different characteristics.

Which One is Right for You?

There are many things to consider with in-ground burials. Graves, burial vaults, cement foundations, headstones, and monuments all vary in options and costs. The expense of burial vaults and cement foundations should not be overlooked because they protect the caskets and the ground from shifting. All of these expenses and decisions can become overwhelming, which has led many families to choose mausoleums. Mausoleums are not just for the wealthy, in fact, the biggest benefit of mausoleums is that it can be simpler and less-expensive than an in-ground burial overall. With mausoleums, there is no need to purchase a vault, a cement foundation, or a headstone because that is all included.

Ultimately, it is up to your family to decide what is best for you and your loved one. There are many things to consider, but we are here to help guide you in the direction that is best for you.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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Walt Whitman Turns 200

walt whitman birthday

Walt Whitman was born on May 31, 1819 and this year is his 200th birthday. He was buried at our very own Harleigh Cemetery in Camden, New Jersey on March 30, 1892. Today we honor and celebrate his life and what he meant to this country.

Life and Legacy

Whitman was born in Huntington, NY, and was the second of nine children. He is best known for Leaves of Grass, a collection of poetry which went through six editions and nine successive printings between 1855 and 1892. Walt Whitman’s work allowed readers to question what they knew about their country, war, sexuality, and religion. He was not afraid to speak on topics that were considered immoral, and was eventually know as the “poet of democracy”. Today, his work is available in multiple languages and is a celebrated masterpiece.

Why We Celebrate

Walt Whitman sparked new ideas and ways of thinking about the world through his work. His courage was an inspiration and is still celebrated today. This is why we honor his life and how his work affected the nation over 150 years ago. His influence can still be felt today.

Source: About Walt Whitman

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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What is a Burial Vault?

burial vault

Though you can’t see them above ground, a burial vault is an option many opt for when planning for their eternal resting place. A burial vault encases the casket, protecting it from heavy machinery used in cemeteries, and of course, the earth above it.

Benefits

Burial vaults benefit both the family of the deceased and the cemetery grounds. Over time, a casket may buckle under the weight of the ground and decay. This causes the ground above it to sink, which can be unsettling to family members visiting deceased relatives. Burial vaults help prevent this, keeping the grounds pristine for visitation.

History

These enclosures are made of wood, brick, metal, fiberglass or concrete and have been used since the 19th century to prevent grave theft. Since then, they have become a popular burial option to help ensure the ground does not sink at the gravesite.

Misconceptions

There is a misconception that vaults are sealed and air tight. This would cause the vault to rupture and fail as pressure builds from decomposition gasses. A vault does not seal the casket, but rather it acts as a strong encasement that protects the casket.

Louis Cicalese, cemetery trustee in New Jersey is president of the board of the historic Harleigh Cemetery and serves as an advisor to a number of non-profit cemetery organizations in New Jersey.

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